Sitting down alone with people actually there but you cant feel them ; is really my greatest downfall.
Damn. I hate all the feelings that im encountering now. Everything that's good is gonna end soon. Infact, it already ended. But the pieces left are really still mendable. So everyone's trying hard. He is trying hard. The moment i heard that kind of voice tone from him, i just so wanna run to him & hug him like so tight! pero hindi nman pwede e ):
Bakit nga ba ang daming pumipigil ? Mali ba to? Ang gulo gulo nman e.
Since the day i met him, both happiness & doubts filled the inner me. I am so so full of worries & fears. At hindi madali yun! Pero from the start, cnbi ko na mismo sa srili ko na mssktan at mssktan lang ako.
Fuck everything. I really want him so much. So much, that im willing to give up what i can. Tanga nman e. Everything is just plain dumb from the beginning. From those 'bawal mainlove' rules to 'bsta gn2 tayo' to NOW! I dont even know WHAT ARE WE now! GAAAAH. nkakapagod. Gs2 kong gawin to, gawin un, tanong yun, tanong to, Eh pucha. Ano ba ko? Sino ba ko? anung karapatan ko!?
Damn. Dati nman, ang dali dali bumitaw e. Pero bat ndi ko ba mgwang tigilan nlang to? & to think im leaving VERY SOON na? God! dba mag mahirap yung pinili mong ituloy kahit na mta2pos lang din? ANU BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA -.-
lies. cheats. hidden reality. pain. Take those words off US can? ): Ive only like 2 months or so left, but i so want this to work out):
bat ko ba to nrrmdaman. ayoko ng gn2. naka2inis. naghi2ntay ako ng tawag. TAWAG MO. its 11.44 PM ! FUCK. you asked me to hold on sa cellphone ko. GAGO. isang oras na kong nagiintay. ni ndi ko alam kng lasing kana. Or kung anu anu na nrrmdaman mo ngaun. GAAH. Daniel. Ten. Whoever you are. IKAW LANG GS2 KU EEEEEE ): ayoko na sa iba. mali yun dba ? ITS VERY WRONG.
so im still thinking. should i put everything to an end & suffer? or let him just stay..... with you. you & him.... & suffer?
Sitting down alone with people actually there but you cant feel them ; is really my greatest downfall.
11:32 PM
Faye.
Let me get this simple & straight.
Im someone. IM REALLY SOMEONE.
Who is yearning for peace of mind.
Someone who wanna correct my mistakes.
And someone who want to change the world.
Lie, to save myself from getting scolded.
BUT PLEASE. THERE'S LOVE in my heart.
So quit the judge. Thanks & try to read my posts. :)
